Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Tear

Do you know the feeling when you have just cried SO Much you can't cry anymore?? Or you have cried for so long you now have a headache? Or you have been crying about something for so many days that the tears just roll down you face at any moment of the day?
We'll the last couple of days have been like that for me. Not only am I crying because we are dealing with "Family Issues" (and that is all I am going to say, I will let you know later what the issue is... possibly) but I am sick and my nose is stuffy and my head is congested. Add marathon crying into that and I am One Hot Mess... The Issue has made me think more about what I am doing everyday...

Am I telling my husband I love him when he comes home?
Am I playing with my kids and getting enough TIME with them?
Am I the kind of person I would want to be when I am standing in front of my judgement?
Does it REALLY matter if I get my TO DO list done??

Sure the little things matter, but I need to make sure the PRIORITY I have on what the little things are is correct. Like me taking the time to let Hailey help me cook, that is a little thing that counts. Playing with Landon and his new Train Table saying "Choo Choo" with him... that counts. But it will not matter if I had the most spotless house, or put on the fakest display of "everything is perfect in Bird Land" no... that stuff will not matter... So I decide to do the little things that matter MORE, and the things that don't LESS. And I decided I need to have a good CRYING FEST whenever I see that I need one...
Crying is a natural thing. It is something I do not have a problem with. I am thankful that our Father in Heaven has given us this tool for coping with hard times.
Thank you all for your love and support. I appreciate all the little things you do for me everyday!! And I hope all your "Cry Fests" are as wonderfully helpful as mine are for me!

Monday, December 27, 2010

Christmas Pictures 2010

I am fasting today, so to get my mind off all the WONDERFUL foods sitting in front of my face mocking me I decided I should do a post with some Christmas Pictures. It was a great day! We had LOTS of fun, and the kids enjoyed ALL the presents they got!!
The Andersen Family Tradition goes a little like this. We pull names for Christmas this way we aren't buying something for EVERY PERSON... then on Christmas Eve you get to open that present from the family member who drew your name...
 Hailey got this ADORABLE Apron from her cousin Kimberley Ray... Of course she had to put it on right away then head to her little play kitchen to make some food with it. SHE LOVES IT!
 And Landon got THIS neat little CAR CARRIER from his cousin Logan Ray... it was a BIG hit! He had to get more cars to use on this little track. You put the cars in the number spaces and it folds up perfectly... we took it to church... besides hearing "beep beep... and VROOMMMMM" every so often it was a GREAT way for the kids to keep occupied.
 Hailey and Landon BOTH enjoyed their gifts from their cousins!! I got a box of See's Candy and a Gift Card for MORE See's Candy's from my sister Crystal and Matt got an Osculating tool he has wanted from my Dad!!
 Before we headed to sleep we opened our last book from Grandma and put out Cookies and Milk for Santa... we thought Hailey had gotten that they were for Santa, until the next morning when she noticed the cookies were gone and she said "Hey, where did my cookies go?" Everything is hers right now... not an easy stage to go through... I have talked about the Bird Family Tradition before with the stockings... you get ALOT in those nice stretchy things... we enjoyed BOTH family traditions on our own this year! (see below)
 "Santa" wrapped most of their presents, but we all went to the Dollar Store to get something for each other for our stockings on Christmas Eve Day. Matt and I switched off the kids and who we were buying for... Dollar Store Stocking Stuffers is the WAY TO GO!
 In the morning Hailey was SO excited. She ran into our room and woke me up asking "IS SANTA HERE?" We had to wake up Landon and head out. She LOVED opening her Stocking presents...
 Landon looks like a pirate in that picture...
It took him a little longer to open up to the "Early Morning Festivities"
 Here they are opening presents. They REALLY enjoyed this part of the day...
 Landon gave me a kiss after he got Toy Story 3 and a Toy Story T-Shirt... he is SO sweet!
 Hailey LOVED this viewfinder she and Landon got from "Santa"...
 WRONG END COWBOY... DO DO DO DOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
 And since Landon is my little COLORING MACHINE I thought it would be neat to see him use a HUGE pen, he rocked it without a problem!!
 And I got an AMAZING gift from my husband. The Hoover Floor Mate. The box tells me I will never need to touch a broom or mop again in my life... I hope this is TRUE! It vacuums, mops and then dries up the water from mopping all in one little machine. It is specifically made for hard floors... laminate wood and tile... HELLO! My floors better SHINE from now on!!!
 And the big gift the kids got was a Train Table Set. The LOVED it!
 They played with it for quite some time. Landon would walk around the table in circles pushing his little train saying "Choo Choo..." SO MUCH FUN!
 And not sure if you can tell but Hailey has THREE packs of PEZZ Candy in her mouth in this picture... yeah she had a great day!!
And THIS is how I roll. Drinking my A&W Root Beer from my Margarita Fresno State Glass... yeah... MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!
(P.S. No, I had not had a shower yet... no judging it was Christmas!)

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Merry Christmas ~

Sure today is great because we all get to open presents from family and friends...
I get to enjoy watching my kids open presents and get excited basking in the glory of Christmas...
But when I sit back and think about Christmas ONE word comes to mind...
CHRIST.

You know I am Mormon right?
I belong to the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints... I know who I am... I know God's Plan... I'll follow him in Faith... (that is part of a Primary song that the young children learn at church, and it is really is the true foundation for them to build on)

I can't help but think about ALL the things our Father in Heaven and his son Jesus Christ has done for US... not just me... US.
Heavenly Father watched his son DIE on a cross for OUR sins...
Christ took ALL OUR PAIN, ALL OUR HURT upon himself...
Who can do that?
He bled from every pore in Gethsemane while praying to our Father in Heaven regarding US.

I KNOW who I am, and the things I have done. And for Jesus Christ to take upon himself ALL MY SINS just seams too much for me to personally handle. So today I am making sure to keep Christ in my thoughts. Whenever a cashier would tell me "Happy Holidays" I would reply "MERRY CHRISTMAS"
Let's not forget who we are celebrating this Season. Christ. His birth, his life, his love. So as I open my presents this year, I will remember the best gift I have ever been given was the gift Jesus Christ gave me many years ago when he made it possible for me to return to my Heavenly Father one day.
I am forever in debt to him for his gracious gift.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Friday, December 24, 2010

A day in the life of THIS Mommy ~

We began happily enough. She had a smile on her face while running out the door and to her side of the car. We were headed for "testing" to get her ready for school next year. Little did she know Mommy was PRAYING today went well. Her father and I pray on a daily basis that things will be normal when we venture off into public places, but alas... she is her fathers daughter and this is how she acts...

Fine at first actually. We have a nice conversation on the car ride over about seeing our teacher and listening and playing nicely. We get to the testing center on time I might add (we had to be there by 8:15 a.m. ~ both kids awake, fed, clothed, AND driving time was accounted for THANK YOU VERY MUCH... two mommy points for ME) We sign in, Landon goes to play, and Hailey and I head with her teacher to the testing room.

Now we are walking to another office, which means we had to go outside. Something about being outside makes her think of RANDOM things. Today it was a baby... We enter the new office, and she protests being there. It was a cold day so I am carrying THREE jackets... hers, Landon's and mine in one arm WITH my beloved Coach Diaper bag. This leaves only one available arm to get her inside...  There are FIVE adults and myself watching her the second she enters, and she FREAKS. She starts talking about her baby, whom is obviously outside and that is where she needs to go... I try to stay calm (have I mentioned I really hate being in public with my children acting out, I mean honestly, WHAT mother enjoys that?) so I put down the jackets and my bag and take her outside to get her beloved baby. She grabs my hand and heads for the car...
"No, Hailey... we need to go back inside..."
She starts to cry and looks at me with those puppy dog eyes and proclaims "No Mommy, let's go home."
I then tell her " Hailey, I don't have my keys or the diaper bag, plus brother is inside we can't leave him here alone."
After a minute of our back and forth banter I talk her inside, and one of the teachers is holding a toy baby. THANK GOODNESS, she calms down and we head to the testing room to get the baby a bottle because she is hungry.
The testing goes fine. She plays well with the teachers and she enjoys the games they are trying to get her to play. While she is playing they are asking me questions. Almost too many questions. They start asking about home life, and family backgrounds, and for some reason I begin to cry. I told them I am a very emotional person, and this is normal. I was telling them about all the moves our family has been through, the two job loss situations which include me being alone with a newborn and toddler while packing up our house to move back to Fresno... moving with a baby less than a month old was VERY taxing on me. We have very frank conversation regarding me possibly never really being able to "mourn" those things and experiences because I was just on "auto pilot mommy" to get through life. They tell me they think some counseling will be good for me. I agree... in the beginning of our marriage Matt and I saw a counselor regarding "problems" with family and marriage and we both learned things about ourselves and the people around us that helped us understand how WE are going to do THIS...

I truly appreciate the teachers and I am very thankful for their help, but I can't help but worry that they think I am one of those "crazy mothers" that can't handle anything and cries at the drop of a hat. I mean I am a "crier" don't get me wrong, but I don't try to cry in front of my kids too often... I begin to think... Am I really crazy?

Anyway, our testing session has come full circle and we are ready to go. Actually WE are not ready to go... I am. Hailey was not done playing with the baby, and she has a MELTDOWN. Not just a little temper tantrum either... no sir A MELTDOWN... (you mothers know what I am talking about right?)
Her emotion apparently creates a toxin in her head which moves to the section of her brain that oversees large motor skills, particularly the ability to move her legs. This toxin immediately shuts down that area, effectively paralyzing her legs, causing her to collapse on the ground. It then makes a lightning-fast jump to the area that oversees tear production and loud, wailing noise making and switches them on. Not only is this physical handicap irritating to me because I want to get home, but since we are in public on a testing trip for my daughter who will be in preschool next year, and she is acting like this... I just know that all of the people in the many offices we pass on our way out are observing this medical condition, misdiagnosing it as a show of rebellion, and looking at me like WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS MOTHER? It did not help that I had just had a nice cry session about LIFE with them, and I have tears streaming down my face in embarrassment as I walked out the door. But I was not able to head to my car... OH NO.. I had to go get my son from the playroom... she calms down a little bit while I let her play with brother, but the WRATH of HAILEY comes again when we go to leave...

At home when she has these outbursts, and or when she's collapsed on the floor laying there like a limp noodle; I would stop and wait for her to hopefully get bored, get over it, and start moving again. She has absolutely no sense of the passage of time today. She's got all the time in the world! So I have abandoned that tactic, and now I immediately hoist her up by her upper arm and hold it in such a way as to make it uncomfortable if she doesn't keep pace with me. She goes limp again so I grab her around the tummy and carry her out like a football. Only I do not look like a tough football player going to the car with fierceness, I look like a helpless mother, crying, and in need of help... The ladies help me out with Landon and the MANY coats and beloved Coach Diaper Bag.

So anyway, we get to the car and she refuses to get in her car seat. She plops down on the sidewalk kicks her boots away, and starts wailing. It's time to face off. Methinks, in the background, I hear the Mortal Kombat song, her theme song, floating on the breeze. Only, since it's Hailey, and she's still just a tiny terror, it's actually a music box version of it. I pick up the boots and stare her down as I grab her arm, lift her up, and proceed to put her into her car seat. She arches her back, the other ladies are watching me FORCE her into her seat, "This is going into my permanent file for sure" I say under my breath. I finally get her in, slam the door, and turn around to grab Landon and my stuff from these helpful ladies. Round One is over.

Round Two begins as we pull into home. I go to get her from her seat, the whole way home she is crying about her beloved baby, and I just want to scream. She hits me and then kicks me as I get her out. I get down on her level and we talk about not hitting and kicking and she just stares at me like I am making no sense... I grab her arm leaving poor little boy in the car and drag her to the front door. Say "uncle," little demon! But the adrenalin rush of a toddler tantrum has made her strong, very strong. She feels nothing but the surge of hot resentment from my refusal to bow to her whims.I get her into the house and head to the car to get the precious things I had to leave behind... End of Round Two.

Round Three. I get into the house and put things away. I still have tears at this point, but they are turning into anger tears. She comes into the front room where I am crying on the couch and she asks me "Why are you crying mommy?" I look up at her thinking is this kid for REALS?... I tell her mommy is sad because Hailey has not been a good girl today... she pats my head and says "I sorry mommy..." and runs off to the playroom...

"Oh no, Missy! After that embarrassing display, you have a timeout! Go to your room!" End of Round Three. And the winner is Mommy,
'CAUSE I SAID SO!
Does anyone else have the "child from H-E-double-hockey-stick?"

~ I read a similar story on a blog of a friend, I copied her story, and pasted it here, changed locations, added an emotional mother, and was baffled at how TOTALLY opposite yet same our situations were... I am sure you could all do the same with my story. Delete a few things, add a few and we are ALL in the same boat! Stay at home mothers with CRAZY kids deserve more than just ONE day a year... can I get an AMEN?

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Wreath ~

So I saw a friend that was making Christmas Wreath's on face book and I TOTALLY wanted to buy one from her. After I realized she was so far from me (she was in Folsom and I am three hours away in Clovis) I decided I better buy one locally.
So I headed out to find the PERFECT wreath. I went to about 5 places and was thrown for a loop at how expensive these suckers were! The cheapest I found that I liked was $25.00... so I headed over to Michael's and decided If my friend can make them... SO CAN I...
I got a plain green wreath and two sets of flowers to decorate it with. It cost me about $8.00 for all the stuff. I got home, got out my handy dandy hot glue gun and went to town!!
This is my final creation ~
 BOOOYEAHHHH! Martha Stewart ain't got NOTHIN' on me ~ Oh, and I had an extra flower, so I decided to make something with it...
 Do you see the flower on her head??
 Yeah, It was SO big it covered her whole head...
But she liked wearing it... HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

MUST BE SANTA ~

So for our Ward Christmas Party GUESS who was Santa??
YUP! My handsome husband was the lucky person to accept the call and be Clovis 3rd Ward Santa...
It was GREAT because he knew some of the kids, but they do not know him very well yet in our ward so it was funny to watch the kids reactions when he would say their names...
 He was a Jolly Old Soul that Santa ~
I thought about going up and giving him a kiss, but I decided I did not want to ruin Christmas and Santa for the kids...
 Clovis Third Ward Santa with his ADORABLE little elves!
 Landon LOVED going to see Santa and getting a Reindeer Candy Cane.
What a BIG BOY!~
However, Hailey REFUSED to go within 5 feet of Dear Old Santa. We had been talking ALL day long about seeing Santa and telling him she wanted a My Little Pony... but all we got was this afraid little girl with one of Santa's Elves! This is one of her babysitters Claire Arcia! Obviously it was a fun time. I should have taken a picture of Hailey enjoying the cookies... then you could have seen she did have a good time...

Friday, December 17, 2010

Taylor Swift ~

I LOVED her first CD... her second CD EVEN MORE, and I am LOVIN' her newest CD SOOOOO Much right now! This girls ROCKS!!

I LOVE how she writes her own music with what is happening in her life. She is a BEAUTIFUL person and an amazing writer! I know she will go far! As far as anything else I have to say... her WHOLE CD ROCKS! Get it while you can!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

DO DO DO DOOOOOOOOO ~

The BIRD Family has a special Christmas Tradition. They all get a Hand Knitted Christmas Stocking when they are born (or married) into the family. These stockings are usually at my in laws house hanging up on their fireplace, but this year Matt and I wanted to start our own traditions in our new house so we got our special stockings to hang on our fireplace.
This is my stocking. It has my name at the top, my birth date and this Angel with a horn...
When the kids saw the horn they did THIS...
 And as they blew they would say " Do Do Do DOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
 I might need to remove them from the fireplace, but until that happens I can get a laugh out of this! :)
Merry Christmas from the Horn Playing Birds! :)

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Gingerbread House

For FHE (Family Home Evening) we decided it would be fun to make a Gingerbread house with the kids...
 Hailey and Matt picked out the stuff we needed to get the job done...
 Both kids REALLY loved helping put on the candy ~
 Hailey lined hers up very neat and nice ~
 Landon was a little sloppy but got the job done and LOVED it!
I think they ATE more candy than what actually went on the house ...
 Our FIRST Gingerbread house ~
Landon was VERY Happy with the end result!
It is SO nice that we are able to spend time together as a family. I really enjoy this time with my children and I am thankful for it! Happy Holidays!!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

GOOOOOOOOOD Morning ~

I often get woken up by one of my two little ones...
This morning I was blessed to be woken up by Little Landon...
 AND HIS CRAZY HAIR!! I could not stop giggling this morning at him! :)
Oh, and we made pancakes for breakfast.
They were YUMMMYYYY!!

Monday, December 13, 2010

SNOWBOARDING TRIP ~

We as a family went to visit my family in Sacramento, but we did not stay together long... My husband Matt and my little brother Preston went SNOWBOARDING!! Matt has wanted to go for a while with Preston, and was finally able to schedule it. It was Preston's first time snowboarding, so he got a Learn to Ride pass, and Matt said he did GREAT! They did not take a camera, so no pictures, but they loved it either way. They went to Sugar Bowl in Tahoe.
 I went there with Matt B.K. (before kids) and enjoyed myself. I was a NATURAL, and so was my brother. He picked it up right away, and they had a blast!
While they did that I SHOPPED away with my Mother and sister Sharon. Oh how I LOVE shopping with them!! They help with the kids and the extra hands for kids is OH SO NICE!! I have two sweet stories from the weekend... FIRST... My mom made some Pumpkin Bread, and when she gave a piece to Landon he happily took it and told her " MMMMMM Nummm Nummm" which is what he says to things he LOVES. Then while we were out and about we got a Slurpee at Target, and while I was taking Hailey out of the basket I took it out of her hand for a moment and she reached back for it saying " My Delicious... MY DELICIOUS..." it was TOO funny! The kids LOVED the visit. They got a little time with everyone and always get spoiled! They especially liked what we came home with... PRESENTS!! :)
Matt and I have come to really enjoy these ROAD TRIPS. We always talk on the drive and we really get UN-interrupted time together. We estimated we had made this EXACT trip over 30 times since we have gotten married. We know how lucky we are to be so near to family, and I hope we always take advantage of that! With the kids in the back watching a movie, we just talk away. During church my family was entertaining the children and it was SO nice to sit there and hold hands. We both talked about how we did this not even thinking when we were dating, and now I think it means even more because we make that special effort with each other to hold hands ... its the little things people!!
We got home with all the presents and decided it was time to put them under the tree. Her is to HOPING the kids don't think Christmas comes early this year!! :)
OH! And we saw the movie Charlie St. Cloud while we were there. We rented it from Redbox... I TOTALLY recommend it! SO worth the dollar rental fee! :)

Friday, December 10, 2010

Baby Baker ~

I know her name is Morgan Baker, but I have been calling her Baby Baker for so long...
We had the PLEASURE of going over to see this sweet little girl when she was just two days old. LUCKILY none of us were sick! :)
 Is she not the SWEETEST little thing or WHAT??
 This shows how small she was... I LOVE seeing my hubby hold babies... PRECIOUS!
 And this is Landon OH SO HAPPY... you would think he was happy because he had just met his future wife... but NO he is happy because he got THIS...
YEP, that my friends is how my kid eats a piece of watermelon... Grandma Baker gave it to him, and he LOVED her for it!
It was a GREAT trip to visit the new family. The parents are doing GREAT, and LOOKED great for having a newborn!! The other night I got to meet Spencer at Target to help him get stuff for a breast pump... we took care of business! :)
LOVE YOU BAKER FAMILY!!
Congratulations on your BEAUTIFUL new addition!!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Entertainment Center

THIS is why I have not blogged ALL week...
 My NEW HUGE ENTERTAINMENT CENTER IS UP!!

When the reviews online said it would take 5 hours they were NOT Kidding... It took us 3 days because we have two kids... need I say more??
ANYWAYS... I LOVE IT, I LOVE IT, I LOVE IT!! Now to put all my CRAP in it! :)